Like my favorite band Panic at the Disco said back in 2005, what a BEAUTIFUL wedding.
Erik and I celebrated our wedding a couple of weeks ago on March 9, 2024. It was everything and more! We were blessed to be surrounded with family and friends from all over the United States and abroad. It truly was the most magical day.
I’m still waiting for photos from my photographer, but once I have them, I will be sure to share them with you all in another blog post.
Until then, I wanted to talk with you all about something that I’ve never really heard about or experienced until now. While I was overjoyed and so fulfilled at Erik and I’s wedding celebration, soon after I began to slowly feel my mood swinging and my adrenaline dropping.
The wedding was such a rush! So much to do, so much to plan, and so much ENERGY.
Post wedding was slow and quiet. Quite the flip!
That quick flip made it easy for me to fall into a tailspin. I am already a rollercoaster gal when it comes to my feelings and moods, so I shouldn’t have been surprised, but I was!
The first day after, Erik and I were getting dinner with one of our wedding party couples and I shared how I was feeling. Shockingly I was met with nothing but validation and understanding. Both of them agreed about how they also had those feelings following their wedding and how it is totally normal. They also said to not be shocked if it lasts a few weeks or maybe longer.
Totally normal and I had no idea.
I’ve found weeks later that it is not only normal but it has happened to almost every single married person that I’ve talked to.
I’m saying this to you all because I’d like to normalize talking about this. I even googled it and the “post wedding blues” comes up very frequently. I had no idea the “post wedding blues” even existed and I’m really wishing that I would have known. There’s so much excitement that comes with planning a wedding, but there’s also a lot of stress and vulnerability that comes with it too.
And, the second it’s over, it’s done. And, you're left with what feels like nothing to plan and nothing to do.
That feeling can be hard to settle with.
We had a BEAUTIFUL wedding. Sure, there were things that certainly could have probably run smoother… I wish I could have tried the coffee bar… I wish I would have been able to talk to everyone… And, I also wish I could have danced more…
The list can be endless and, of course, is completely unnecessary.
But, it’s those post wedding blues, honey. (Must be heard in the southern accent of Ms. Phaedra Parks or it just won’t hit the same.)
It’s time to break the silence on this. Let’s talk about the Post Wedding Blues.
From talking to many friends and doing some research of my own, I’ve found the list below to be completely normal. If you are feeling any of the things below post wedding, you are heard, you are validated, and it is totally normal to feel the things that you are feeling.
Post Wedding Blues Symptoms
Feeling a deeper level of boredom, loneliness, isolation, and tiredness
Feeling a lack of purpose and drive
Lack of wanting to work or do normal day-to-day tasks
Hyper critical of oneself and/or the wedding day
And, the list goes on and on. If you are feeling these things, it is totally normal.
I’m here for you and chances are your married friends will also understand you, just as I am validating you today. Your body is going through an emotional withdrawal and you need time to heal.
I urge you to talk with your married friends and family. Get those feelings out to someone who has been there.
If you need a little extra help, don’t be afraid to reach out to a therapist for some extra help if it’s needed.
For me talking with my married friends and family has been super helpful. But, it’s time for me to get out of my own head!
As I sit here writing this blog post, I am almost 2 weeks post wedding. And, I’m still struggling to reach the equilibrium that I desire. The validation that what I’m feeling is normal is good, but it didn’t solve the issue.
So, it’s about time to start climbing my way out of this funk. You can thank the Instagram algorithm for inspiring me with an activity for all the newlywed guys and gals out there who may be struggling with the Post Wedding Blues like myself.
The inspiration for this activity comes from a funny (& super relatable) reel I saw the other day from Lance Bass. The headline read “POV: the daily conversations I have with my husband.” The audio started with, “I’ve been feeling really down these days and I don’t know why.” The narrator came back with questions and then Lance responded:
Have you exercised today? No. Did you go outside? No. Did you talk to anyone? No. Did you eat well? No. Did you limit your scrolling time? No. Did you make any plans? No. Did you drink enough water? No. Did you get enough sleep? No. Wait, yes. Yes, to that one!
While I cackled at the reel originally, it’s become a learning experience that is still stuck with me a week later as I’m writing this blog. So, of course, I’ve turned it into an exercise of how to get myself back on track and back to feeling more like myself again. Hopefully, this helps you too!
In my defense, I also came home and got a sinus infection within the last week, so that hasn’t made matters any better. I don’t recommend getting sick during the post wedding blues. 😭
Anyway, let’s get started.
Post Wedding Blues Action Plan
Basically, I’m just mirroring Lance Bass’ reel. I will be implementing these things back into my life slowly, but surely. I welcome all accountability partners! Message me and check in!
Exercise daily - Whether it’s 5 mins or an hour, every bit counts.
Go outside - Go for a walk in the neighborhood or drive to a new place to explore.
Talk to friends and family - Let everyone know what I’ve been feeling.
Eat well - Eat better foods and more routinely. But, don’t be afraid to have a cheat day (or two).
Limit screen and scrolling time - Social media is draining! Take a break when you need it.
Read More - Reading has become a new hobby of mine as of late. I love escaping into a story or new world. It's really helped me to get out of my head.
Make Plans - Reach out and make plans with friends and family. The Lord knows I didn’t have time this past year for making hangout plans, but now I have all the time to do so. Make it work and prioritize time with loved ones!
Drink Water - I could always drink more water. And, when I do, I always feel better. Time to be more consistently hydrated.
Sleep well - Good routined sleep is key. When you’re depressed, oversleeping can be common. And, sometimes you need it. Take the time you need to get this back to normal and always make sure you get all your hours in.
With our honeymoon right around the corner, I knew it was time to nip these post wedding blues in the bum. I’m confident in the process. And, you’ve got this too! I’m praying for you. We’ll get there. Send prayers and good vibes!
I love y’all!
Talk soon.
Until Next Time,
Jessie Cali Kraft ← See what I did there!
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