Life is unpredictable.
That’s the hard part of life, isn’t it? The unpredictable nature of life.
We all love different capacities of control over where our life is going. But it’s not that easy to find control over your life, right?
Because if it was, we’d all be enjoying life’s pleasures on our perfect timelines in our perfect places with seemingly no issues in sight. And that’s just not reality.
We are built to question and to wonder where our life is headed. We are built to strive to figure out what is unknown. There is no problem with the journey to finding one’s self and purpose. The problem is with the lack of embracing life’s unpredictability. We have to become people who strive to embrace life’s challenges and unpredictable nature because life is ever changing and will continue to throw storm’s your way.
We also live in a world where there are massive amounts of digestible content of people’s perfect lives and beautiful worlds. We scroll through social media watching videos of people’s perfect relationships, beautiful travels, full families with lots of love, and continuous smiling faces.
At a young age, we are taught the way that life goes. A simple timeline that starts at your birth and moves through school, career, marriage, and then eventually to having children of your own and so on and so forth. There is a way it is supposed to go. And there is an assumed timing of when those things should happen. So naturally, when life does not go our way and we watch as our peers progress forward, it is easy to fall into a place of sadness and depression.
Back before social media, while it was less in your face what all of your peers were up to, it still was a known problem. Being off of the natural timeline of life can be debilitating and frustrating. You get that feeling of being left behind with no clear vision of joy in sight. You wonder what is wrong with you. And sometimes you are not someone who feels that the so-called natural timeline of life is for you.
It’s daunting. And social media does make that worse. Now it’s not only your peers influencing your moods and feelings, but also the millions of other people, celebrities and influencers content you are engaging with day to day.
A good reality check often comes when that perfect couple you follow breaks up out of nowhere. You think… WOW. They just posted a video of how happy they were two weeks ago, what happened?!
Well, just like your life, their life isn’t perfect either. You never know what goes on behind closed doors. And even if you feel like you are getting content from people’s personal lives, you still don’t know everything, especially when the camera turns off.
Social Media is built to show the brighter sides of life. It’s rare to see someone’s vulnerability come out on social media. Not impossible, but rare.
I am someone who struggles with embracing life's unpredictability. I find it hard to find joy when my life feels unbalanced and off kilter.
I am in a constant state of reminding myself of my purpose, my joys, and why I am right where I’m supposed to be. It’s easy to get off track, but you have to find your way back and move forward.
I often find myself thinking, “I’m 32 now. I’m behind. I’m supposed to have had children already.”
Silly! But it’s just one of those intrusive thoughts that I have. I have to reset my brain and remember why I’m not on that timeline and that my timeline is okay too. You don’t have to conform to the natural norms of life. It’s okay to be taking your time and moving through life one step at a time.
In fact, I would argue that rushing through the timeline of life is NOT the answer. You just have to take everything one day at a time.
So, how do we do that? How do we embrace life’s unpredictability? How do we find joy beyond our timelines?
To put it simply, this is how I plan to answer those questions:
Stop trying to conform to a sense of control of your life.
Be okay with the unknown.
Stop comparing yourself to others and their lives.
Find the root issue of your intrusive thoughts.
Relax. Breathe. Move.
If you've been feeling imbalanced or just not like yourself, I get it. I've been there and I often find myself revisiting these feelings. It's okay to not always be 100% okay. You are perfectly imperfect right where you are today.
Until Next Time,
Jessie
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